Maybe you are taking a big chunk of time off this year, or maybe you are pushing through and trying to get stuff done along the way (this is me… this year I’ve got some big things to tick off across Christmas and the holidays still).
Either way, Christmas is one of those times of year… you know the ones…
When it’s good, it’s great…. and when it’s not, it’s a disaster.
Something about this season can bring out the best and the worst in people.
So if you’re taking a big chunk of time off, have wonderful family relationships, and are looking forward to a period of relaxation and bliss…. awesome! (This blog post is probably not for you)
But if you’re already beginning to wonder how to make it all work, if you know you’re visiting family or extended family who push your buttons, if this season brings up a whole heap of emotions…. then this is for you.
3 Strategies for surviving the holiday season
1. Check in with your expectations.
Christmas day (much like Valentines day, and a bunch of other holidays which have become a bit commercialised) now comes with an idyllic image of how the day should be.
Mountains of gifts, perfectly presented food, smiling loved ones, giggling and a mum that looks like she has everything under control… you’ve seen the ads.
The problem comes when our personal situation doesn’t reflect the image we’ve been sold.
It leads us to feel guilty, to feel like we’re not doing enough… or wishing it was different.
So before you get to Christmas, check in with your own personal expectations of the day.
Are they realistic?
Are they putting too much pressure on you or on another family member?
How will you feel if they aren’t met?
If you start with a realistic end in mind, the whole thing will be much easier to handle.
2. Set boundaries
A wonderful friend of mine knows that her family push her buttons, so she has a time limit for how long she spends with them. She knows that if she stays past that people run out of patience for each other and tempers become frayed.
Each time she thinks things are going well, and that she might stay for a while longer, things get bad… so now she sticks to her time limit, politely excuses herself and leaves.
Your situation might not be quite like that, but you know what works for you and your family.
Maybe you need 5 minutes peace in the evening after a long day?
Maybe you need time to meditate in the morning?
Maybe there are certain family members you just don’t need to visit?
You are under no obligation this season, so set boundaries which work for you and don’t be afraid to stick to them.
3. Communicate clearly
I’m not a mind reader. I do my best, but if someone doesn’t tell me what’s going on, then I can’t help.
(Are you listening Miss 9, who forgets to tell me she needs a share platter for school, just before we leave the house).
This works both ways though.
If I don’t clearly explain what I expect from her in terms of behaviour or chores to be completed, how will she know what to do?
If you don’t clearly communicate your expectations or your boundaries to your partner, your family, your kids, or anyone else involved, then how can you expect them to understand what’s going on?
(I need to hear this too!! This sentence is for me!!)
If you know you can only be somewhere for a set period of time, set that expectation in advance, or when you arrive.
“Thanks for inviting us, we’ll be there. We do have to leave by {time} for {reason}”
“But Sam, this seems completely irrelevant to courses or even business…..?! “
Possibly, but here’s my 2 cents…
If your personal life is stressful, it will impact your physical and mental health… and that in turn will impact the health of your business. When we are the ones responsible for our business, it can’t help but be impacted by things that go on in our life.
I’d love to say that it doesn’t.
I’d love to say that you can draw a perfect line between your business and your personal life, and one doesn’t impact the other, but it’s just not the case.
If you have a full team running the business, and it doesn’t need you at all, then great.
But for most of us, if you are hurting, your business is too.
Put boundaries in place, and have a great festive period.